This post is not about you.
Logging into my email the other day, I noticed a message from an unknown sender. The teaser said, “We love your super cute blog.” Super cute should have raised a warning flag, but I opened the email anyway…and had a good laugh.
It was from a website that offers fashion tips. People submit their pictures and questions (“Does this outfit look good?”) and then the moderators (of which I could be one?!) offer their sage fashion advice.
*I had already realized that this email went out to everybody with a blogger account, but it was at this point that I started laughing hysterically.*
Can you imagine me giving fashion advice? I own 2 purses (if the diaper bag counts as one), I have one bottle of nail polish in the same color I’ve been wearing on my toes since approximately 1994, my home is decorated with baseball memorabilia, my daily attire consists of a t-shirt, sneakers, and yoga pants.
I did have a stroke of brilliance one time when I matched my hoodie to the swish on my Nikes.
My comments would consist of, “Can you even walk in those shoes?” “How many bracelets do you need, woman?” and “No, a miniskirt is not appropriate attire for a baseball game.”
Needless to say, I did not respond to this email, but the laughter helped me burn off the Twinkie I ate for lunch.
And a little story about the Boss. I’m still trying to figure out how her brain works. She keeps us in stitches. We have had some trouble keeping her in bed at night, but have finally found something that works. I would tell you what it is, but the phrase “cruisin’ for a bruisin’” might raise an alert at CPS headquarters. Knowing full well that she cannot get OUT of bed, we had the following conversation a few days ago.
“Mommy, I in my bed. I have hiccups…need chocolate milk.” (I launch a sippy cup of water into her bed.)
“Mommy, I in my bed. Forgot to brush my teeth.” (This one, being untrue, was just ignored.)
“Mommy, I in my bed. I need my sockies on.” (Luke puts socks on her.)
“Mommy, I in my bed. Need to tell you something. My daddy put my sockies on Samantha Raye.” (That’s great, now go to sleep!)
“Mommy, I in my bed. Forgot to pray for grandma!” (I go in there to say prayers, again.)
“Mommy, I in my bed. I have boogers. Need to blow them out.” (Sounds of snickering coming from my room.)
I think after that she fell asleep…sheesh….My kids are unbelievable sometimes.